Love's a Funny Thing
by Autumn Misery
Summary: The odds of Uchiha Itachi falling in love with me? Zero. But why do my eyes stay on him? And why does the other Uchiha seem oddly interested? "Love's a funny thing Sakura-chan."


**xxx**

_Though I don't even know your name_

_It doesn't matter_

_You're my experimental game_

_Just human nature_

- I Kissed a Girl

_At the Club…_

I kissed her lips sensually. A moan was elicited. Gently prying her lips open and gaining access of her mouth, my hands wandered lightly to her waist and I could feel her knees almost buckling.

And I pulled back. My eyes twinkled as I lazily smiled at her. _Now tell me that wasn't mind blowing… _

The female in front of me couldn't be more than 20 years old. Her soft brown hair once tied in a neat ponytail, made loose by my fingers running through it, along with her bruised lips from our kiss made her seem so vulnerable. I couldn't tell if her mind was still hazy from the shock of kissing me or the illicit pleasure she got out of it. Out of breath and flushing bright red, she gave a self-conscious smile before loud cheers were heard from offstage.

_Aah... Bachelorette parties are always so amusing... _I mused to myself.

The bachelorette, always flushing bright red when the hired male strippers gave strip shows, embarrassed when the rest of her friends pushes her on stage, oh and when she kisses someone like me.

Another girl.

I licked my lips and drawled, "How was that for kissing a girl?"

She squeaked nervously as the rest of her girlfriends whistled and clapped for the obviously shy bachelorette. I laid a finger on her cheeks and languidly traced her face. Unsurprisingly, she shivered slightly at my ghost of a touch.

It was so easy to please them; an erotic kiss, a seductive dance… and perhaps a strip tease. Being the only female entertainer at a bachelorette actually makes my job easier. Most often it was for the purpose of fulfilling the forbidden desire of kissing another girl before the wedding but sometimes, such as this, it was for timid to-be-married women to do something naughty before being tied down to one man for life… basically enslaving yourself into the last legal form of slavery. But I guess it doesn't really matter what I think.

Satisfied that I had unsettled the bachelorette and pleased her friends, I knew my job was done for the night. Giving a little last smile, I slipped off the stage and let the rest of my colleagues entertain the estrogen driven audience.

"Sakura," a soft voice called out. I turned hesitantly at first but smiled when I saw who it was.

"Sasuke, you made it!" My eyes lit up. I couldn't help it, I hadn't seen him for a while now.

"I told you I would didn't I? You of all people should know I don't break promises."

"And I also know you don't like coming to see me in my workplace." Suddenly I felt Sasuke snake his arms around my waist. With his head nestled at the crook of my neck I could feel his breath tickling my hair gently. _Of course, leave it to the Uchiha's to make a girl blush… _

"But I do like seeing you." Sasuke replied smoothly. Then I laughed and pushed him away, swatting him playfully.

"Always such a flirt Sasuke, but seriously why did you insist on picking me up today? You're normally busy on weekdays." I asked as I took off my heels and marveled how sore my feet were. Holding both my heels in my right hand, I grabbed his hand with my left.

"It's nothing big." He reassuringly squeezed my hand. "There's a family fathering tomorrow night."

I raised my eyebrows.

"…I need a date." He hinted

Oh. _I know where this is going… _

I groaned, "Sasuke, please tell me you're not goin-" He grinned cheekily,

"Be my date? Just one more time." He pleaded, knowing very well that I was going to cave.

"This is like the fourth time this month you've asked me to do this Sasuke. What is going on? I'll go with you but these frequent family gatherings are getting ridiculous." I mumbled as I gave the most exasperated sigh I could muster up, although he knew I was more than happy to accompany him.

He scoffed, "The elders are bugging all the male heirs to get married and start popping babies. Apparently this is the final meeting and whoever doesn't show up basically gets disowned."

I raised my eyebrow, "They've always been pushy. But isn't this a little too much? Plus, what are people like Shisui going to do? He's not exactly Mr. I'm-going-to-get-married-soon."

Shisui was renowned for his inability to settle with one girl. Come to think of it, I can't even remember the last time he had an actual girlfriend…

"Yeah, you weren't complaining a couple months ago…" Sasuke trailed as he grinned cheekily.

"Shut up! You know I was dead drunk. I still can't remember, much less believe half the crap you guys told me I did."

So you know how everybody has a couple nights in their life they can point to and say, "hey, that was the time I was dead drunk and did things that I wanted to crawl into a hole and die of embarrassment of!" Well, that night was one of _those _nights. Yeah. The only bits and pieces I recalled from that night was going to the new club in town for Hinata and Naruto's engagement party. Our whole crowd of friends was there; dancing and celebrating the two incredibly shy relationship-takers' engagement.

I was at the bar, drinking a dry martini, when some guy asked me to dance. I remembered dancing with Sai and few other guys I met at the club. Apparently, I got into a drinking contest after dancing. Which was probably one of the biggest mistakes ever because everything after that to me was pretty much blur. Just a string of words from all my friends.

According to them, I was pretty out of it by the time I decided to walk into the closest booth and climbed onto the first guy I saw. Which was Neji.

Hyuuga Neji.

The stuck up, hot, and boyfriend of one of my best friends.

Yeah, _that _Neji.

Then I proceeded to kiss Neji… oh, _did I mention _in front of Ten Ten too? And the worst part was that Ino-pig decided it would be funny if they actually let me hook up with him. When they told me, which was 2 days later seeing that I had the worst hangover ever, I think I used up all my mouthwash.

Ten Ten and I laugh about it even now because she told me she was pretty out of it that night too so she just played along with the others. According to Neji, who was probably one of the only few that didn't get drunk that night, we were full force making out too. I remember not being able to hang out with him one on one for a couple days after that. I mean, how could he willingly let a drunken girl make out with a perfectly sober and in-a-relationship male like him?

Don't get me wrong; it wasn't the whole making out thing that got me nervous around him. It was the fact that I knew I've always been attracted to him and I actually hooked up with him in midst of my drunken stupor… in front of all the people that definitely should not have witnessed it.

So maybe that's embarrassing. But whatever right? Laugh it about with girls, little apology, few awkward moments, a little teasing, and everything's okay.

But get this, there's a lot more of where _that _came from.

I got the next part from Hinata, which probably made it worse seeing that _she _was cracking up in her little shy-Hinata kind of way too when she told me. Which definitely made me want to crawl into a little hole…

After announcing to the whole word I had kissed Ten Ten's boyfriend and that he was a "decent kisser and had better hair than I did," I jumped back into the dance floor. By that time, Ino was convinced I couldn't make a bigger fool of myself so she didn't bother stopping me…which I definitely hate her for.

Because I gave Uchiha Sasuke a lap dance…

Here's the thing. Sasuke and I had a thing all throughout high school. He was one of those rich boys that were gifted with the whole package: looks, money, fame, and all. Of course, it was just another cliché story. A little teasing, a lot of flirting, and a few sweet moments. We met sophomore year and broke up right after graduation. It was mutual. We both felt like we had come to know each other so well that with college coming up and everything, we should take a break and just be friends.

Of course, Sasuke wasn't just my boyfriend through high school; he was my confidant and best friend. Granted, there weren't any crazy fights, there were still a couple tears of missing the comfort of a steady boyfriend from me, but that was the extent of it. Nothing dramatic if that's what you're wondering.

A couple days after graduation, he went to some Ivy in America and I stayed in Konoha. We led distinctly different lives but some how fate got us twisted back together and all of us reunited again after college.

Ten Ten and Neji got together in college and so did Naruto and Hinata. Sai and I met freshman year and were roommates in college. We were close but our relationship was never defined. We occasionally hooked up but I also knew neither of us were interested in relationships... which I was good with. Seeing that Sai was… and _is _an unique friend. Then again, that ice cube probably doesn't know the difference between hooking up and being in a relationship.

Of course, when Sasuke moved back he fit right back into the group. Naruto was ecstatic and the guys welcomed the extra testosterone Sasuke brought to the group. Of course Sasuke and I chatted about our relationship and decided to leave it in high school. We were over that. It was good while it lasted and we shouldn't try to polish good old memories.

…Which brings me back to the topic of me giving him a lap dance.

Right. So they say that, which I still don't believe because _seriously? _I'm convinced they all made this up to fluster me; I grabbed Sasuke from another girl on the dance floor and pulled him to a couch. While I then proceeded to _attempt _to kiss him too.

Underline, bold, do whatever makes the word _attempt _jump out. Attempt. Because Sasuke just laughed and moved me off his lap stating that I had no idea what I was doing. Which I'm glad he did because I really didn't have any idea of what the hell I was doing.

Oh and get this, I started tearing up. By the time Hinata got to this part, the guys were howling and the girls were snickering at me. Yeah, like small tears brimming by my eyes. Sasuke claimed that I pouted and asked him why he didn't think I was attractive. Which he promptly replied that I had no idea what I was doing and would probably regret it later.

Then I gave some slurred speech on how Neji was a good kisser and told Sasuke that if he didn't like my kisses I'll give him a lap dance. Which was exactly what I did. I won't go into details because Sasuke told me he left right after that. Figures.

I told him he probably needed a cold shower, he told me I should shut up.

I laughed weakly at that part… still not believing the public act of embarrassment I put myself through. And still, there was **more. **

So everyone knew the Shisui was probably one of the only publically certified person out there that if you make out with him even in a relationship, it doesn't count. Before I make him sound like some type of man whore, he is, after all, Shisui. Carefree and the exact opposite of a serious boy. Shisui was just one of those guys you can point to and say "hey I hooked up with him, he's sweet."

Contrary to most people's belief seeing that Shisui and I hang out a lot, we never hook up. Or up until that night we never did. I appreciated being one of his few actual female friends and I think he enjoyed verbal spars with me everyday. But of course, in the midst of my drunken stupor, I decided to make moves on even Shisui.

Not the most embarrassing thing but definitely the most regretful.

Even mildly thinking, much less describe, what I did Shisui is too disturbing to me. Let's just say, he was a very happy boy on the dance floor after I was finish… _dancing _ with him.

But the most horrifying part of the night for me was last. Save the best for last right?

With Sasuke out, Neji and Ten Ten making out in their booth (which I find oddly creepy seeing that I had my tongue down his throat moments before), Hinata and Naruto gave polite goodbyes before heading back to their apartment. Ah… Their shy love was so cute.

So Ino-pig and Shikamaru, who is the sole reason I trust Ino's words about what happened that night, were the only witness to my last and worst act of that night.

It was no secret I was attracted to the older Uchiha. First of all, I already made out with Neji AND Sasuke that night so I wasn't exactly picky on whom I _expressed _my attraction to. But secondly, Uchiha Itachi was a godly specimen. Granted I thought he was good looking all throughout high school when I caught fleeting glances of him in the Uchiha mansion every time I visited Sasuke, nothing every happened.

We've only talked a couple times and when I mean talk, I mean idiotic awkward schoolgirl talk to high school boyfriend's hot hunk of a brother. Sasuke knew about my little crush on his brother but we both knew it wasn't going to go anywhere. I was too smitten with Sasuke at that time to make a move and Itachi already had his ridiculous share of good-looking girls. Come to think of it, if it was possible, all the girls have had small crushes on him. I know Ino-pig definitely did. Ten-Ten was attracted to him, which we found out through a late night of Truth and Dare. Oh, and even Hinata told us he was "better looking than most" was in Hinata language meant drop dead gorgeous.

Anyways, he was at the club that night too. Sasuke had told him we were going to be there and I guess he took a couple of his friends. Shikamaru said that he didn't drink that night which is another reason I never want to talk to him again because that night probably was and is still crystal clear to him. He was with girls a couple years older than us and a bunch of his friends when I decided to crawl up to the bar counter. And strip.

Before anything, I work as an "entertainer" for extra cash on the side, which is what I was doing tonight when Sasuke picked me up. So dancing for people is no problem for me. Erotic dancing even. I'm not a whore, I know that much. If you want to call me promiscuous, go ahead. Hell, a slut even. But stripping was a little extreme even for me.

I wasn't wearing the whole glamorous club outfit like Ino that night. I had a loose tank top on with another tight one underneath and jeans. We were celebrating for Hinata so I didn't think it was important for me dress to impress. Plus, I wasn't exactly expecting Itachi to show up.

There was a crowd of people gathered whistling as I stripped shamelessly. My outer loose tank top was off and I was in the teasing process of taking off my tight tank top off seeing that it was up to right above my belly when supposedly Itachi saw me. We haven't seen each other in years, much less talk. But Ino and Shikamaru both claim that he shouted across the club, which of course I promptly either ignored or just didn't hear, and took off my tank top leaving me in my black bra. At least I wore a decent bra right?

By the time Itachi pushed people aside to save his little brother's ex-girlfriend from public humiliation, I was on the verge of unzipping my jeans. Oh god, I can't even imagine what I would do if I had actually stripped… like the whole deal. Safe to say, I was thankful to hear Itachi had literally pushed me off the counter and dragged me out of the club.

Whining and screaming at him, I had kicked him really hard when I got outside of the club. Which he proceeded to pick me up and threw me in the car. Grabbing some of his friends, I had sat in the back with Deidara and according to him, puppy eyed him and attempted to take off his shirt. Which of course he happily complied knowing his personality of not caring whether the girl in the back seat was completely out of it or not. Then Itachi threw him out of the car of something and told him to walk home.

That part was sweet.

But if he was being Mr. Nice Guy why did he literally kick me out of his car too, drive off with two blond whores, and never ensue to talk to me afterwards?

And that was the part that bummed me out. Of course the worst night of my life, one of the only few I humiliate myself it has to be in front of someone that never even bothered sparing me a glance all these years.

"Hey, you still there? Let's get you home." A voiced called out and I snapped out of my trance.

"Sorry, I was just thinking about that night. You know, the whole Neji, you, and Shisui thing at the club" I grinned unabashedly.

Sasuke grinned, "Reliving that good old day huh? Well lets go, you must tired."

I smiled appreciatively at Sasuke.

"Hey Sasuke? I love you." I just felt like telling him that. He somehow found time to be always there for me regardless how busy he is

His eyes wavered and he smiled back, "I know." He stopped for a second, "Okay, enough of this lets get out of here shall we princess?"

I laughed. _I guess I'll be seeing you tomorrow night… Itachi.

* * *

_

**Authors Notes:**

New story! I actually wrote this a while ago, probably around 4 months ago. But tell me what you think about it and constructive criticism is appreciated!


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